Your probally dont have Private Message Notification on.
Funny you meantion UBBThreads. I am a loyal UBBThreads user and beta tester. Their template system is almost identical to what we use. In fact it is so similar it is scary. The Developer for Photopost is a UBBThreads user. They use the same if conditional switch's and you can also change the language strings to replace them with Image tags etc.
I personally absolutely hate the VB template system while alot around here love it.
Now as far as moving code or such that is a hacking question and probally why you had trouble posting on the UBBThreads forums. They are not going to answer you since hacking your software is not a function of a support forum. There are hack sites out there that customers can ask questions on. For UBBThreads that hack site is http://www.threadsdev.com
and we have one as well http://www.photopostdev.com
I would normally tell you to post hacking questions there. Your question is rather simple so while it is not a support measure I will PM you an example of what you want to do to redefine and move the logout button